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Parenting toddlers can sometimes be frustrating to the point of wanting to pull your hair out. This is because adults seem to believe that a toddler can think like an adult.  They can't.

Although toddlers do not have the ability to think abstractly, yet, they do have the ability to understand simple directions, conversations and rewards. What this means is when there is something that is important for you, there must be something equally or more important for your toddler or young child.

When we are parenting toddlers, we must begin to understand that they have needs and desires just like you do. At my grandchildren's Christmas Concert last night, there was a woman with a two to three year old child and that child was driving her crazy! He was running around and climbing on the platforms where the children in the concert were performing; he was a real nightmare.

Mom was giving the child her cell phone and pretending to play with him, though you could see that she just wanted to take him out of there. It is a major parenting mistake to give your toddler a cell phone, iPad or other distraction when they are acting out of order. This just teaches the child to act out of sorts whenever they choose to play with your phone!

Another problem comes when you have older children in the house. Teens are notorious for not picking up after themselves. It's all too easy for the teen to leave clothing, books, makeup, and items of sentimental value lying around. Sparks fly when the toddler finds these things and claims them as being, "MINE!"  Try explaining to a two year-old that the lipstick they just found isn't candy or face paint and that they can't have it. The baby only knows that the object is pretty and possession is nine-tenths of the law. Toddlers understand the concept of "mine" well enough, but they haven't figured out that everyone has a "mine".

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Of course, the consequences of not picking up is a hard lesson for the teen to learn, distracted as they are while shouting at the baby to give up the treasure. The general rule of thumb to tell teens is that if they don't want something torn apart, dropped, broken, chewed on, swallowed, or lost, put the item away, out of sight, or far enough out of the reach of tiny, curious hands.

A middle ground might be one where the teen puts all valuables far out of reach or in drawers, and then reserve a lower shelf or special toy chest for when the baby wanders into the room. Items that are safe for the baby to handle and play with can be put in these places and make the younger child feel as important as their older sibling. After all, the baby just wants to do what big sis or brother is doing or to have some attention, right?

A toddler requires constant supervision no matter how careful you are. Child proofing your home is one small step to keeping your toddler safe, and you will constantly have to be on top of things to keep your child out of trouble. What worked yesterday as a deterrent might be useless tomorrow, and you'll need a new tactic. Be aware and observant, because accidents happen faster than you think.

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Paul Beard
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Paul Beard

Executive Director at LIGHTHOUSE 2911
Paul A. Beard has designed programs and written several information guides and books about parents and families.
http://www.familylifepage.com
Paul Beard
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Parenting Books for Toddlers
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